Mobileread
The FIRST PARAGRAPH from your novel or short story
#1  Dr. Drib 02-19-2009, 06:33 PM
And please tell us about it.

Here's a list of things you can think about sharing:

What genre?
Novel/short story?
Plot?
Character(s)
Setting?
Scene?
What else?

Many, many ideas you can mention and discuss with other members when you share your FIRST PARAGRAPH.


Don
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#2  Moejoe 02-19-2009, 06:40 PM
First paragraph (or thereabouts):

---------------------------
At first a whisper.
The soft beating of wings.
Technician Ramirez strolled into the garden of memory and looked up toward the flocking dead above him. A billion and more bright holographic butterflies. Each a soul. Each a life lived and ready to be retold at a moments notice.

--------------------

Novel: The Song of Insects
Setting: Upon the back of a walking city as it crosses from winter into spring.
Plot: When her mother's memory, trapped within a holographic butterfly, is let loose upon the eve of her birthday, Miho embarks upon a journey across the walking city of Istas to retrieve the butterfly and the secrets of the past.
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#3  Dr. Drib 02-19-2009, 06:52 PM
Quote Moejoe
First paragraph (or thereabouts):

---------------------------
At first a whisper.
The soft beating of wings.
Technician Ramirez strolled into the garden of memory and looked up toward the flocking dead above him. A billion and more bright holographic butterflies. Each a soul. Each a life lived and ready to be retold at a moments notice.

--------------------

Novel: The Song of Insects
Setting: Upon the back of a walking city as it crosses from winter into spring.
Plot: When her mother's memory, trapped within a holographic butterfly, is let loose upon the eve of her birthday, Miho embarks upon a journey across the walking city of Istas to retrieve the butterfly and the secrets of the past.

Great! -- Very poetic.

How far are you into it?


Don
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#4  Moejoe 02-19-2009, 06:55 PM
Quote Dr. Drib
Great! -- Very poetic.

How far are you into it?


Don

I'm looking at finishing end of this month (including edits), the first draft is already completed. It should come out at around 50-55,000 words, depending on the edit and I'm hoping to put it up on MobileRead in various formats - I'm learning a lot about .epub at the moment to produce the very best version I can.
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#5  Dr. Drib 02-19-2009, 07:03 PM
Hi, Moejoe.

I can also put it together for you in LRF and mobi/.prc, if you wish.

However, have you also considered professional ebook markets for getting your novel out there?

Let me know if you'd like me to format it for you. I've assembled some books here on MobileRead.




Don
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#6  pshrynk 02-19-2009, 07:07 PM
I'm doing this from memory, because my story is on my home computer:


My top wing was in tatters, the right lower wobbling alarmingly, and the my engine was sputtering its last breaths. I was deep over German territory and a Fokker was lining up on me from behind. My days in the Royal Army Air Force being at an end, I started concentrating on making my retirement stretch out to the years category from mere seconds. It really didn't look good.


An action/adventure tale of a WWI RAAF pilot who goes on to be a bush pilot in Panama. Being as it's me writing, there will be humor. No talking dogs, probably. I'm about three chapters in to the back story, which will be eked out as flashbacks and have started the "real" first chapter.
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#7  Moejoe 02-19-2009, 07:14 PM
Quote Dr. Drib
Hi, Moejoe.

I can also put it together for you in LRF and mobi/.prc, if you wish.

However, have you also considered professional ebook markets for getting your novel out there?

Let me know if you'd like me to format it for you. I've assembled some books here on MobileRead.




Don

Thankyou kindly for the offer

When it's done I'll contact you and take you up on the formatting, as I'm focusing mainly on .epub at the moment and wouldn't know where to start with .mobi and LRF.

At the moment the plan is to put my novel out there without any DRM for free and in as many formats as possible. I'm at the very early stages of a year-long plan with a couple of unpublished authors to set up a site offering their work DRM free and donation-driven also. My work is acting as the guinea pig for the others

We've been investigating avenues of e-book publishing and are unimpressed so far with what we've seen. What we're aiming for is to put the work out as unencumbered by DRM or set-prices as possible and let the work decide its own future. If enough people like said work, we may go a donation route. If the work is poorly recieved, then we'll hold off on the donation but continue to put out the work until there is enough momentum to ask for donations. We're all in agreement that the fiction we produce must be free in the first instance, or available under Creative Commons licensing.

In any case, it's an exciting time to be writing and be involved with ebooks
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#8  slayda 02-19-2009, 07:40 PM
Title - Recycling

Genre - SF

Short story (that I will never write - too much work for a country boy)

Character(s) - Joe, his wife (in civilization), his wife/woman (in the barbaric land)

First Paragraph - "He was bored. 9 - 5 every day. Air conditioned house to air conditioned car to air conditioned office. Shuffle papers and back again. No change, no action, adventure unless you count Betty's nagging every nigh. Why can't something exciting happen. Then one night 'The dream' happened. He was in an arena, fighting for his life."

Plot - Joe's bored with his mundane office job. ... He dreams (as in night time dreams) of being a gladiator. Each night the dream becomes more and more detailed and his days begin to fade until the arena is his life and he forgets the office job. He meets Bet-a-yeh, a beautiful and exciting slave woman. They become lovers. ... His fighting skills continue to improve until no one can give him any competition. Bet-a-yeh begins to get on his nerves and constantly nags. Every day is the same - go to the arena, chop up some opponents & return to Bet-a-yeh's nagging - so boring until one day he dreams of a great city. Everyone there is civilized, no blood & guts. He wishes that was his life. Every night the dreams become more and more real and the area fades to nothing. ...
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#9  delphidb96 02-19-2009, 07:49 PM
Quote Dr. Drib
And please tell us about it.

Here's a list of things you can think about sharing:

First storyline:

What genre?
Mainstream/"Chick" Lit.

Novel/short story?

Plot?
Woman meets man, woman falls in love with man, woman is abandoned by man, woman loses best friend to AIDS, woman stands alone (while seeking the future for her child).

Character(s)
Richard Leonard - entering scene. Viewpoint of Stephanie Elaine Hardesty.

Setting?
Local bar, downtown Sacramento, CA.

Scene?
Establishes how Richard first came to the attention of the protagonist, Elaine.

What else?
And here's the opening paragraph:

His stride first caught my eye. He prowled to the bar, never hesitating, never dodging or weaving around the other patrons. It was as if they unconsciously withdrew from his desired path. His motion riveted my attention; I felt compelled to watch his progress to the bar. As I watched, he reached his destination, drew the bartender's attention with a casual wave of his hand and leaned possessively against the rail.


Second storyline:

What genre?
SF

Novel/short story?

Plot?
Four friends face the challenge of creating a life and businesses as independent contractors - in orbit - during the construction of orbital power stations.

Character(s)
Dora Clarissa Priscilla Melinda Barbara Celinda Anne Rodriguez - yes, she IS carrying the weight of all those ancestors in her name.

Setting?
Las Cruces, NM.

Scene?
Establishes that Dora has just graduated and is moving into 'real life'.

What else?
And here's the opening paragraph:

“… Congratulations and farewell, Class of 2009!”

With those words from the Dean, Dora’s classmates sprang to their feet, letting loose with cheers, catcalls and, yes, she heard correctly, even a few Rebel War Yells. She felt… she didn’t know how she felt, but excessive exuberance or joy weren’t it. Yes, she’d graduated from college, the first in her family to do so; her mother and father were a dozen or so rows back, waiting to congratulate her. Why wasn’t she happy, Dora pondered?

Many, many ideas you can mention and discuss with other members when you share your FIRST PARAGRAPH.

Don
And there you have the openings of "With Hesitant Stride" and "Homebrew".

Derek
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#10  jaxx6166 02-19-2009, 07:51 PM
The first days were always the hardest. It had been six months since I stopped counting the days and the nights. But somehow, somehow — I knew this was the first day. Maybe it was the black fog overhead, or the constant beat of war drums coming ever closer.

"War"

A 1200 word short-short in a PA setting. The POV character is a young father who is never named. His only goal is the safety of his newborn daughter. It doesn't exactly end happy or satisfying. But Planet-Mag picked it up in October of last year. I think you can still find it on their archives. Or I can post what I have here.
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